Strange revelations.
After an interesting conversation with a family member last night, I am left wondering if everything we see, is simply seen the way we want to see it?
I thought for the last decade that I was doing something worthwhile and rewarding.I fervently believed that the decisions I made were the right ones for me and for my family. I even thought that I had a purpose for making the decisions I made. Today i wonder if maybe I saw it wrong.
I have had 24 hours to review my revelations and I more and more convinced that you cant have regrets for the decisions you make but life always lets you know when its time to move on. Even though I feel extremely disappointed and hurt, I am going to hold on to what I believe was the right decision, but I also know this chapter is over and its time to move on.
What am I grateful for? The ability to love unconditionally and to know when that love is not enough.
Love you guys.
Sunday, April 25, 2010
Wednesday, April 21, 2010
Battered not Beaten
I cant get over how many people today are on street corners with signs saying, "lost job can you help?
Recently I started my new $5 dollar fit club, I created it as an outlet for me to help people who have lost their jobs, feeling unmotivated or even depressed. I have met so many people who are so thankful to simply be able to get outside, get their bodies moving and communicate with others about what they are going through.
Today I am greatful for the opportunity to meet these great people and all the inspiration they give me to move on, go on and have faith.
What are you greatful for?
PS-remember, grateful was taken so I grabbed greatful.
Recently I started my new $5 dollar fit club, I created it as an outlet for me to help people who have lost their jobs, feeling unmotivated or even depressed. I have met so many people who are so thankful to simply be able to get outside, get their bodies moving and communicate with others about what they are going through.
Today I am greatful for the opportunity to meet these great people and all the inspiration they give me to move on, go on and have faith.
What are you greatful for?
PS-remember, grateful was taken so I grabbed greatful.
Tuesday, April 13, 2010
The Power of Love
Well I have been begging for the Power of Love today. I know it sounds corny but I have been feeling strange and low lately and today I went out looking for love.
I first went out for a run and found myself seeing and looking at things that I havent noticed before. Then I went to lunch with my family and thought of the love of my family. Even though you often cant share what you are really feeling with your friends and family so i sat at lunch thinking how grateful I am for the family I have had.
It has been a long couple of years and often I have felt eerily lonely even though there is love around me. So, this being one of those weeks, I am thankful I was able to see love today.
What are you greatful for?
I first went out for a run and found myself seeing and looking at things that I havent noticed before. Then I went to lunch with my family and thought of the love of my family. Even though you often cant share what you are really feeling with your friends and family so i sat at lunch thinking how grateful I am for the family I have had.
It has been a long couple of years and often I have felt eerily lonely even though there is love around me. So, this being one of those weeks, I am thankful I was able to see love today.
What are you greatful for?
Sunday, April 4, 2010
Easter Thanks
Thanks to all those who have been at my side all these months and loved me, looked in on me and cared about what has happened to me and where I landed.
Easter is a great time to remember and be thankul for what we have. You dont have to be religious to be thankful. You can just find something in your life or someone that is awesome, loves you and cares, and be thankful. This Easter, I am thankful that I still have hope, have friends and my health. Thank you.
Take care.
Easter is a great time to remember and be thankul for what we have. You dont have to be religious to be thankful. You can just find something in your life or someone that is awesome, loves you and cares, and be thankful. This Easter, I am thankful that I still have hope, have friends and my health. Thank you.
Take care.
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
THE GIFT OF KINDNESS
Everyone who knows me, knows I cant pass a person on the side of the road, at a stop light or anywhere who is holding a sign that they are homeless etc, without giving them something.
I just cant pass them by. I realize that many people say that they are just making money or they need to get a job but when I drive or walk by those people I always wonder, how did they get here? Since I was a kid, I always assumed that there is good in most people and that in this case they really have a need greater than mine.
In the last few years I have been very limited from actually giving. I have not been good about giving to my church or to anyone, however, I still will not walk by someone who needs a dollar without stopping and giving them something.
This morning outside my grocery store, there was an older gentlemen asking for money, his sign was that he was recently homeless and looking for work. Well, I didnt care if his story was true, I simply stopped and gave him a dollar and my coins.
You may ask why? The REAL REASON is, I hope that if I am ever in that place, alone, homeless or forgotten, that someone will stop and at least show me respect and kindness. I wouldnt want your money, but I would at least want you to walk by and not assume I am bad or lazy for being out here asking for help.
Sometimes you just have to help without asking why.
I am greatful for that man today reminding me to be thankful for what I do have.
Thank you.
I just cant pass them by. I realize that many people say that they are just making money or they need to get a job but when I drive or walk by those people I always wonder, how did they get here? Since I was a kid, I always assumed that there is good in most people and that in this case they really have a need greater than mine.
In the last few years I have been very limited from actually giving. I have not been good about giving to my church or to anyone, however, I still will not walk by someone who needs a dollar without stopping and giving them something.
This morning outside my grocery store, there was an older gentlemen asking for money, his sign was that he was recently homeless and looking for work. Well, I didnt care if his story was true, I simply stopped and gave him a dollar and my coins.
You may ask why? The REAL REASON is, I hope that if I am ever in that place, alone, homeless or forgotten, that someone will stop and at least show me respect and kindness. I wouldnt want your money, but I would at least want you to walk by and not assume I am bad or lazy for being out here asking for help.
Sometimes you just have to help without asking why.
I am greatful for that man today reminding me to be thankful for what I do have.
Thank you.
Sunday, March 14, 2010
Its been Awhile
Well everyone its been awhile. I hope you are all doing well.
Ive had so much on my mind everyday, that Ive almost had a block to be able to write.
I am greatful in the last few weeks to make some new friends, to play Tennis again and to have my family close to me. The last 2 years havent been easy and as a truly religious person have tested my faith. I often ask God, not why me but why now? AS I wake up this Sunday morning, everything I once thought I had or what I knew is truly now gone, so I struggle with my faith and I struggle with what I believe. And the only thing that is a constant is my belief that somehow life has to get better. If you are struggling with something, an issue or a someone in your life, try to think about looking ahead and believing in that things will get better.
The one thing I would say to anyone struggling is that dont forget, people love you, even if you dont feel that in the worst of times, there is someone out there that loves you, believes in you and cares. Keep that thought in your mind.
Thank you for reading. Im thinking of you!
Ive had so much on my mind everyday, that Ive almost had a block to be able to write.
I am greatful in the last few weeks to make some new friends, to play Tennis again and to have my family close to me. The last 2 years havent been easy and as a truly religious person have tested my faith. I often ask God, not why me but why now? AS I wake up this Sunday morning, everything I once thought I had or what I knew is truly now gone, so I struggle with my faith and I struggle with what I believe. And the only thing that is a constant is my belief that somehow life has to get better. If you are struggling with something, an issue or a someone in your life, try to think about looking ahead and believing in that things will get better.
The one thing I would say to anyone struggling is that dont forget, people love you, even if you dont feel that in the worst of times, there is someone out there that loves you, believes in you and cares. Keep that thought in your mind.
Thank you for reading. Im thinking of you!
Wednesday, March 3, 2010
WHAT I LEARNED TODAY
Today I have to be thankful for what I have not what I dont have.
No matter how hard the last years have been, how many changes I am going thru, or even how many times I have decided to give up. I decided in the middle of my moment of gray, I decided to think of those who have it worse.
My friends mom who just had a stroke, the homeless at my church every Sunday, the women in my fitness group who cant afford anything, jobless, etc. I know that I still have my friends, those praying for me, those thinking of me. I know that I still have my faith.
I have decided to say a prayer tonite about those who are truly suffering, even though I feel like I am suffering to, I KNOW Ill be ok, I hope they will be as well.
Thank you for thinking of me and reading. I am greatful and grateful!
Thank you!
No matter how hard the last years have been, how many changes I am going thru, or even how many times I have decided to give up. I decided in the middle of my moment of gray, I decided to think of those who have it worse.
My friends mom who just had a stroke, the homeless at my church every Sunday, the women in my fitness group who cant afford anything, jobless, etc. I know that I still have my friends, those praying for me, those thinking of me. I know that I still have my faith.
I have decided to say a prayer tonite about those who are truly suffering, even though I feel like I am suffering to, I KNOW Ill be ok, I hope they will be as well.
Thank you for thinking of me and reading. I am greatful and grateful!
Thank you!
Sunday, February 21, 2010
The Spotlight
Did you ever feel like the spotlight is just on you. Well, I was that person who always wanted to be at the top of my public career, know everyone and be talked about.
Now, I just want to be lay low, do my own thing and be happy. I realize this sounds simplitsitc, but on this Sunday, I am thankful for the couple of friends I do have and I value them. I am slowly learning that we can not control what others think of us, we can only control how we are. So, go on your way loving yourself and recognize those couple of friends who truly love you for you.
Thanks friends, I love you.
Now, I just want to be lay low, do my own thing and be happy. I realize this sounds simplitsitc, but on this Sunday, I am thankful for the couple of friends I do have and I value them. I am slowly learning that we can not control what others think of us, we can only control how we are. So, go on your way loving yourself and recognize those couple of friends who truly love you for you.
Thanks friends, I love you.
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
I WOKE UP
Todays I have to say that I have found it hard to write about anything.
Then I remembered the dream I had last night. I dreamed that a friend moved away.
In the dream I was sad that my friend was moving and as the dream went on, I saw all of my other friends with him in his new place and I was still here, in the same place.
My dream woke me up and I was sad, then I remembered that I have not been friends with these people in a long time and that I havent seen them in years. I wonder why I dreamed this and realized that I miss these friendships but I promised myself to move forward and understand that new people will come into my life.
I am greatful for the ability and wisdom to understand and be bitter.
What are you grateful for?
Then I remembered the dream I had last night. I dreamed that a friend moved away.
In the dream I was sad that my friend was moving and as the dream went on, I saw all of my other friends with him in his new place and I was still here, in the same place.
My dream woke me up and I was sad, then I remembered that I have not been friends with these people in a long time and that I havent seen them in years. I wonder why I dreamed this and realized that I miss these friendships but I promised myself to move forward and understand that new people will come into my life.
I am greatful for the ability and wisdom to understand and be bitter.
What are you grateful for?
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
THE POWER OF CHANGE
Today I grateful for the power of change. Understanding that time proven adage from the Bushist world, that nothing ever stays the same.
I have been hit with this over and over again. Things are gonna change and there is nothing you can do about it. As much as we try and hold on to something or someone, if it is time for this to be over, it is going to be over. I remember reading, Who Moved My Cheese by: Spencer Johnson, years ago, and it seems a lesson I can not seem live by. So, here it is again.
I am living proof that change will happen and if you are not accepting of it, you will be stuck on many level. I have been stuck, spiritually and physically for so long that today I vow to try harder at moving on.
I am grateful you are my friends.
What are you grateful for?
PS. pls remember grateful was taken b4..so I had to use GREATFUL.
I have been hit with this over and over again. Things are gonna change and there is nothing you can do about it. As much as we try and hold on to something or someone, if it is time for this to be over, it is going to be over. I remember reading, Who Moved My Cheese by: Spencer Johnson, years ago, and it seems a lesson I can not seem live by. So, here it is again.
I am living proof that change will happen and if you are not accepting of it, you will be stuck on many level. I have been stuck, spiritually and physically for so long that today I vow to try harder at moving on.
I am grateful you are my friends.
What are you grateful for?
PS. pls remember grateful was taken b4..so I had to use GREATFUL.
Sunday, February 7, 2010
The Power of Time.
Today I am reminded of how great it is to see the passing of time in the people you know.
This morning I ran into an old client/friend, who I havent see in almost 10 years.
As he was telling me about all his triumph of the last few years, which included, a wedding, a child and creating a successful business, all I could think of was how time has flown by.
And even though his story reminded of me how times goes by so fast, I was so happy to hear what a great life he had built for himself. Today I am thankful for friends.
Thank you.
What are you grateful/gratful for?
This morning I ran into an old client/friend, who I havent see in almost 10 years.
As he was telling me about all his triumph of the last few years, which included, a wedding, a child and creating a successful business, all I could think of was how time has flown by.
And even though his story reminded of me how times goes by so fast, I was so happy to hear what a great life he had built for himself. Today I am thankful for friends.
Thank you.
What are you grateful/gratful for?
Sunday, January 31, 2010
Tampa's Homeless
This morning I was able to go and help my Church serve the homeless.
The get served a great warm meal every Sunday morning at my church, Hyde Park United Methodist.
I have to tell you that I was aware that there were homeless all over our country. But when actually meeting these individuals I was so amazed at the diversity. From young and old, to men and women, I cant beleive that there are so many amongst us.
People who came this morning might not even be homeless, there are also people who have a place to live but no FOOD.
Standing there helping serve I just wanted to cry. I am thankful to just being there and able to say hello to everyone of them and wish them well. I was so touched by some of the younger girls and guys and I wanted ask,how did you get here? I was remembering how many times this year I have felt sorry for myself and thought, but I still have a home and some food in my fridge.
Well, today I am greatful for what I have and the chance to meet some very nice people who just need our prayers and love.
What am I greatful for? Love! Love! Love!
PS as a reminder, it grateful, but it was alreay taken.
The get served a great warm meal every Sunday morning at my church, Hyde Park United Methodist.
I have to tell you that I was aware that there were homeless all over our country. But when actually meeting these individuals I was so amazed at the diversity. From young and old, to men and women, I cant beleive that there are so many amongst us.
People who came this morning might not even be homeless, there are also people who have a place to live but no FOOD.
Standing there helping serve I just wanted to cry. I am thankful to just being there and able to say hello to everyone of them and wish them well. I was so touched by some of the younger girls and guys and I wanted ask,how did you get here? I was remembering how many times this year I have felt sorry for myself and thought, but I still have a home and some food in my fridge.
Well, today I am greatful for what I have and the chance to meet some very nice people who just need our prayers and love.
What am I greatful for? Love! Love! Love!
PS as a reminder, it grateful, but it was alreay taken.
Sunday, January 24, 2010
THE POWER OF FAMILY
This Sunday afternoon I am so thankful for family.
My brothers and my Mom. I know that I often write about the hardship
and realities of life, but today I felt like expressing my thanks to
the power of family.
I know in the world there are so many that are alone, lonely or suffering. They
have no one to turn to or talk to. I always wish they had someone to be there with them as I do. Even though I never wanna burden my family with all my problems. I
know they are there for me in spirit.
I hope you have someone and are not alone. Happy Sunday!
My brothers and my Mom. I know that I often write about the hardship
and realities of life, but today I felt like expressing my thanks to
the power of family.
I know in the world there are so many that are alone, lonely or suffering. They
have no one to turn to or talk to. I always wish they had someone to be there with them as I do. Even though I never wanna burden my family with all my problems. I
know they are there for me in spirit.
I hope you have someone and are not alone. Happy Sunday!
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
Wheres The Road?
Often there are days in the last couple years where I ask myself, wheres my faith?
I was a kid raised very religious and with lots of faith. I always knew that the faith gave me strength.
Wheres that strength thru faith right now? I never realized I was so fragile. I never knew I could lose my faith so easily. As I navigate days like this, I keep thinking that everything will be ok. Why is it that I cant stick to that thought.
As my faith is tested, I can only look to my young brother, I know I cant give up. I wanna see him graduate, go to college, have a family etc. I have to will myself to keep going/moving. I just cant give up.
I dont know what im greatful for, but I thank you for reading.
What are you greatful for today?
I was a kid raised very religious and with lots of faith. I always knew that the faith gave me strength.
Wheres that strength thru faith right now? I never realized I was so fragile. I never knew I could lose my faith so easily. As I navigate days like this, I keep thinking that everything will be ok. Why is it that I cant stick to that thought.
As my faith is tested, I can only look to my young brother, I know I cant give up. I wanna see him graduate, go to college, have a family etc. I have to will myself to keep going/moving. I just cant give up.
I dont know what im greatful for, but I thank you for reading.
What are you greatful for today?
Saturday, January 16, 2010
Better Days
Hello Friends,
AS I posted on Tanfat blog, I know things are changing dramatically
in the next few days. I wanted to say that so many in the world are suffering, there are some really great people out there who love you and are so supportive.
Stay close to your friends and be thankful for the love you recieve. See you soon.
Remember those in Haiti!
AS I posted on Tanfat blog, I know things are changing dramatically
in the next few days. I wanted to say that so many in the world are suffering, there are some really great people out there who love you and are so supportive.
Stay close to your friends and be thankful for the love you recieve. See you soon.
Remember those in Haiti!
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
A HAITI REMINDER
With the world focused on the awful tragedy in Haiti today, I have thought that I
can stop feeling sorry for myslf and remember that the world has many people in need.
There are so many that are hungry, in pain, wronly accused, suffering and thus I am still lucky to be me and have many blessings. Today I am praying for the people in Haiti.
I am greatful for a giving world.
What are you greatful for?
can stop feeling sorry for myslf and remember that the world has many people in need.
There are so many that are hungry, in pain, wronly accused, suffering and thus I am still lucky to be me and have many blessings. Today I am praying for the people in Haiti.
I am greatful for a giving world.
What are you greatful for?
Monday, January 11, 2010
Its Cold Outside
All I can say, is that I am thankful for having electricity. I know there are many
homeless, jobless and more. So, I can thankful for the fact that with friends I have been able to still have my home and electric.
Thanks to heat!
What are you thankful for?
homeless, jobless and more. So, I can thankful for the fact that with friends I have been able to still have my home and electric.
Thanks to heat!
What are you thankful for?
Thursday, January 7, 2010
2010 - Catherine the Great
Today I am so thankful for Catherine the Great.
Catherine has been a great friend to me over the last few years. She has been supportive and full of advice. I am thankful for her kindness and for checking in on me whenever she can.
I hope we all have a friend like Catherine. As 2010 goes forward, there will be some huge challenges for me and there may even be some terrible things that will be decided. I am not longer afraid of being homeless or not having utilities. I am simply going to try and take on TODAY and not dwell on tommorrow.
GREATFUL.
Catherine has been a great friend to me over the last few years. She has been supportive and full of advice. I am thankful for her kindness and for checking in on me whenever she can.
I hope we all have a friend like Catherine. As 2010 goes forward, there will be some huge challenges for me and there may even be some terrible things that will be decided. I am not longer afraid of being homeless or not having utilities. I am simply going to try and take on TODAY and not dwell on tommorrow.
GREATFUL.
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
20109- LOOKING FOR FORWARD
2010- LOOKING FORWARD.
Well it is a new year and a time to look forward. I am trying to do that. During the 2 weeks of the holidays, I took time to try and realize that whatever is happening to me is going to happen and I dont have control over it. I took the 2 weeks and
decided that I need to stay in the moment.
My goal is that no matter what is happening or going to happen, it will.I need to stay in the moment and try and get back to being the person I am, used to be, wanna be.
What am I greatful for? The moment.
Well it is a new year and a time to look forward. I am trying to do that. During the 2 weeks of the holidays, I took time to try and realize that whatever is happening to me is going to happen and I dont have control over it. I took the 2 weeks and
decided that I need to stay in the moment.
My goal is that no matter what is happening or going to happen, it will.I need to stay in the moment and try and get back to being the person I am, used to be, wanna be.
What am I greatful for? The moment.
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